How do I keep from falling back into my old way of being?
ByThis is a recent question that I received:
I am so ready to step into my authentic self and really embrace all that I desire, but I still feel part of myself resisting it.
Why is that??
If I can see who I want to be, what is stopping me from jumping in with both feet? Why do I find myself falling back into my old way of being and my ‘not-me’ behaviors?
This is a great question that many of my clients face.
The short answer: You need to commit to feeling things fully so that you no longer need those ‘not-me’ behaviors and old ways of being.
These behaviors and ways of being that you are trying to release are deeply ingrained in your ego and there is energy attached to them. You developed all the ‘not-me’ behavior in order to avoid feeling some kind of undesirable feeling. As children, our bodies are not equipped to run a lot of energy, and as a result, you got overwhelmed very easily. Typically, the folks around you can’t handle it, and you feel that, which enforces the idea that feeling those overwhelming feelings is undesirable, besides the fact that overwhelm does not feel good. So you begin to avoid feeling these energies at all costs.
Enter your EGO.
Your ego loves to identify everything and put a label on it so it knows what to expect. It gets really good at identifying any feeling that could potentially lead to overwhelm and creates all kinds of behaviors that keep you “safe” from these undesirable energies. In order to do this, a whole bunch of unconscious stories, beliefs and habits are developed that make up your perspective around how the world works, and who you need to be in order to survive in it.
What this all comes down to is that you are resisting feeling things fully.
Most of this stuff is unconscious and goes unexamined until you decide to make changes in your life.
Deciding to do the work to change your life is a conscious activity, especially if being truly authentic is your goal. Part of being conscious is to be fully present to what you are feeling…..which equals feeling things fully.
This is a major shift for many people.
The Ego convinces you that the intellect is king and it is all about thinking, where as your higher-self knows that all the information you need is right here in this moment for you to feel.
See the problem here?
If you are not committed to feeling things fully then you miss out on so much importnat information. You also fall back into these unconscious “not-me” behaviors and ways of being that are created to avoid feeling things fully.
The next question is: Won’t my head explode if I am feeling everything fully? Won’t I become overwhelmed?
The reality is that as we grow older and our bodies become fully developed we are totally capable of feeling everything and much, much more than we ever imagined. Your body is designed to be present in this wondrous and amazing world. You can feel and process everything you need to. The best part is, that as you allow yourself to really feel things fully, and experience all that there is for you to experience, it gets easier and easier to do. Your ability to feel and run energy expands. Next thing you know you are tapped right into your ever abundant flow and the world is your playground.
What do you think? Are you ready to jump in to your ever abundant flow?
2 Comments
March 11th, 2010 at 4:39 pm
sounds super familiar! and I am embracing and ever so lovingly letting go of the “old” ways/beliefs that no longer fit- hell they are wayyyyyyyyyyyyy outta my style!!
I’m happy to write a blurp about my experience with you-
as always a happy go lucky box defy-er;
b
March 11th, 2010 at 5:45 pm
You are a bright shooting star Beth! Keep on Rocking it out.