Archive for life coaching
The Problem with Protecting Yourself From Your Desires
Posted by: | CommentsWhat do you want in your life and business?
The most common answer I hear to this question is “I don’t know”.
I think you do know, but you’re afraid to claim it because you don’t think you can really have it.
And that is the problem.
You don’t believe you can have what you want, so you don’t give yourself permission to go for it.
You protect yourself from your “unreasonable” desires by ignoring them. You only allow yourself to want the things you think you can have.
You think small and play small.
Guess what happens when you think and play small?
You ignore your desire to travel the world doing boudoir photo shoots and settle for taking pictures of kids and weddings because it seems doable and you really need the money. You end up frustrated and uninspired which negatively impacts your profits.
Or
You stay in the unsatisfying relationship because it’s better than the other’s that you have had, and you settle for a partner who doesn’t give you the love and affection that you desire. You crave affection and touch, and begin to feel undesirable. You end up wondering how you ended up this way.
Want to know how to change it?
Recognize that the only thing stopping you from having everything you desire is your story saying you can’t have it.
This story prevents you from dreaming and playing big! It makes you settle for an unsatisfying relationship, sucky job, and keeps you from expanding into your greatness.
We are here to expand, grow and be inspired.
Stop reigning yourself in and ignoring your desires. If you feel a strong desire that keeps coming back, it is meant for you! Give yourself permission to go for it!! The Universe is on your side and will show you the way if you let it.
The challenge is to identify where your stories about what is possible are holding you back. It’s hard to see these stories because you’re too close to them and they are wound deep into your belief system. You often need an outside perspective to see them clearly.
Here are so examples of the changes that can happen when you change up your story-
“You mean all I have to do is stop lying to myself?” is what an amazing women who hired me to help her improve her social life said. With-in one week of discovering the crappy old story that prevented her from having the relationships that she wanted, she was filling up her social calendar with fun new connections.
It can be that easy!
Another client let go of the stories that prevented her from going for her dream of being a documentary film maker, and someone else stopped playing it small and went on to create a life changing women’s event.
I can help you say “yes” to your desires and allow them in. You will be going for your dream job, expanding into your greatness, and tapping into all the juicy goodness that the world has to offer you.
Is this something that you can use? If your answer is “hell Yhea” send me an email and lets talk.
Owning Your Bad-Ass Self
Posted by: | CommentsIn my previous post I laid out the three key components to flying your freak flag so you can AMP UP your shine factor and make more money.
In this post I’m going to talk about key #1: Owning who you are and what differentiates you from all the rest.
If you want to own who you are: you got to know who you are!
You need to know what drives you, what is special about you, and give yourself permission to be 100% you in your full freaky glory.
Start off by answering these questions:
Why would someone want to hire you instead of someone else?
What is your unique perspective about the world and how it works?
What are your super powers?
If you can answer these questions – Yay!! You’re on your way to flying your freak flag high and proud.
If you can’t – you are not alone!!
I see a lot of people getting stuck and having a hard time answering these kinds of questions.
Are you taking these things for granted or having a hard time seeing them to begin with?
Have you taken the time to really get to know yourselves intimately, learn what works, or what your preferences are?
Are you too caught up in the bus-y-ness of life and trying to do everything the right way – that you’ve lost touch with your own way of doing things?
I suspect that you spend way more time thinking about how you can “fix” yourself and improve your perceived flaws. I’m going to tell you right now you wasting your time doing that. You’re way better off spending your time thinking about all your talents, preferences and what makes you rock!
Give yourself permission to be 100% you! Flaws, quirks, strengths, freaky bits, and everything in between!
LOVE. IT. ALL
I can’t express how important this piece of the process is!
I suggest spending some time reconnecting with YOU and what makes you tick. Set aside some quiet space in your day to journal, mediate, or just hang out with YOU. Notice how you feel and what your inner-guidance is telling you. Write it down. Notice with out judgement. It’s all good!
In most cases, the things that are freaky and weird about you are going to be your strongest selling points. All you need to do is embrace them and bring them forward ( I know, easier said than done! This is something that I can help you with. *wink*.)
From an energetic perspective…
Coming to place of love and acceptance within yourself, and knowing what your super powers are is vital if you want to become super shiny to the people who are going to buy from you.
How you feel about yourself and the work you do is reflected in your energy and people unconsciously respond to it.
If you own your amazing ability to express emotion through your voice or cut through the bullshit to see where someone is blocked, then you will be sending a strong clear signal out saying, “I am great at this!” You will attract opportunities to do those things. When you doubt yourself and aren’t clear on what you’re good at; you send out doubtful energy that attracts more of the same.
Here are some action steps to help you OWN your Bad-Ass Self!
Make a commitment to get to know YOU better.
Consider these things:
- Pay attention to what you do naturally and what interests you (this is where your super powers can be found).
- Acknowledge your strengths and your weaknesses and find a way to embrace both.
- Notice your natural rhythm and the way you like to work with people.
- Pay attention to what your point of view and unique perspective are.
- Identify what you stand for in your life and your business. What kind of revolution would you like to lead? (This is really important, and I’ll talk more about it in the next blog post.)
If your want a some extra help – The Discovering Kick-Ass Guide is just the thing-
Share your thoughts and questions in the comments below!
Unfurl that Freak Flag!!
Posted by: | CommentsContrary to what you may think, your freak flag doesn’t have to be anything crazy, unless crazy is your thing!
Flying your freak flag is more about showing up fully and not being afraid to show the world who you are and what’s important to you. It’s about taking a stand and having an opinion and not being afraid to share and wave it about.
Flying your freak flag gives you the freedom to be who you are. No more hiding, making sure you say the right thing, and doing things the right way. That takes way to much energy-energy that you could use having fun and doing things that interest you.
I know- it’s scary to show up fully and wave your freak flag! You never know how people will react to it. People get offended so easily, but that’s not your problem.
Seriously…it’s not!!
You can’t control how people react to you and your opinions. Their reaction is not about you at all and is all about them. Not everyone is going to like you no matter what you do. So stop worrying about it. Be yourself; let the world see who you are; and live a kick-ass life.
One cool thing about flying your freak flag is that it makes it really easy for the people who resonate with your opinions and what you offer to find you. When everyone one is trying to fit-in and not offend anyone it’s impossible to know what someone stands for and who they are. It’s impossible to make a real connection with someone because there is nothing to grab onto. I think about it as one big beige blur….nothing stands out and catches your eye. You have to look really hard to determine what differentiate one person/ service provider from another.
Do you want to be part of the big beige blur or do you want to stand out and shine so your people can find you?
Here’s a fun exercise-Create your own freak flag!
Think about what you would put on an actual flag that would represent who you are and what you stand for. It could be anything. Think about the things that are meaningful to you that you would like to bring more of into your life.
My amazing and talented boyfriend made his own freak flag a few months ago.
Here is a picture of it- Pretty cool huh?
What do you think it says about him?
I’ve been playing with this idea for a while. I’d put a mermaid, with wild blue and purple hair and a corset on with a big vortex of creation swirling around her. She would be a wild child mermaid who manifests everything she desires. Teeheeha!
Play around with this idea for a while and let me know what you come up with. If you make one…send me a picture!!!!! I’d love to see it.
How to Stay Focused on Your Kick-Ass Life
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I don’t know about you, but I’m finding it really challenging to stay focused on how Kick-Ass my life actually is, when I’m being bombarded with all the fearful messages that are flying around in the media lately. I understand that we are facing some big challenges, and things are shifting and changing quickly, but to tell you the truth—This is a good thing!
It is pretty obvious that the way we have been living is deeply unsatisfying for a lot of people…….that’s why you’re here, right? The status quo isn’t working for you and you want to live a more meaningful, fun, satisfying life.
I think this desire runs deep in all human beings and in order to shift things for the highest good of all mankind, we need to shake things up and do things differently, and that is exactly what I feel is happening right now. People are feeling the pressure to take action to make their lives better, the time for tolerating oppression and all the shit that is not in alignment with your inner being is over. People everywhere are questioning archaic oppressive structures and empowering themselves to take action, it’s a beautiful thing really.
I’m of the opinion that now more than ever the world needs people who are tuned into their purpose and sharing what only they can share with the world. YOU have a unique perspective and piece of the puzzle and now IS the time to bring it forward. The world needs what you have to offer!!!! Believe that!
So how do you not get bogged down in fear and worry with all the turmoil that is happening? The trick is to stay focused and centered in your truth, and to keep moving towards how you want your life to be. It is common to hunker down in times like these, but now is the perfect time to keep moving forward and heading towards your dreams.
Even if society as we know it shifts and changes, you can still live a Kick-Ass Life. (If your thinking that going after your Kick-Ass Life is a selfish or foolish endeavor when things are so uncertain, then we need to talk about the importance of living your purpose and how to bust through that fear.)
Here are a few things that you can do to keep from getting bogged down in the drama and paralyzed by fear and worry.
1. Stop watching the news!!! Or at least take it in very small doses from non-hysterical sources. 6 hours of CNN a day is not helpful, and don’t get me started on Fox News! The media is trying to influence you to conform to their way of thinking. They want you to be afraid and to feel powerless. It makes you much easier to manipulate.
2. Have a daily practice to connect with your heart and center yourself on a daily basis. Mediation is good, a quiet walk without the headphones blaring, some plain old quiet time to sit for a minute and relax. Do whatever you need to be quiet ad slow down so you can actually here yourself think, and connect to what your heart is asking for.
3. Look for things that are Kick-Ass. Spend time everyday appreciating your life. Notice the beautiful flowers, feel the warm sun on your skin and bask in the juicy good feeling of these things. The Daily Kick-Ass List is something that I created to help my clients with this. I have included it in the Leah recommends section below.
4. Focus your attention on what you DO want to happen. Don’t get caught up in the drama of bitching, moaning, and complaining about how sucky things are. The more you talk about the things that aren’t working for you the more energy that you are giving to them. If you only do one thing from this list-Do this- Learn to focus your attention from what you don’t like to what you do want. Your focus and attention is something that you can actually control. Shift your attention to what you want to see happen and look for solutions to the problems rather than just getting pissed off, worried, or talking about how stupid the Senate is being to everyone you know on FB.
5. Look for evidence of your abundance! I know right now people are worried about $$$$. Make a habit of looking for evidence of your abundance. Things like- “Hey-I found a penny!”, “My friend fed me a wonderful meal!” and “In this moment I have everything I need” go a long way to boosting your ability to attract more abundance into your life. I like to meditate on these thoughts- “ The Universe prospers me” and “ The Universe provides me with everything that I need, life is good.”
6. Focus on the things that make your life meaningful, and that you are interested in and do more of them!!!! Do I need to say anymore about this?
7. Talk about your dreams and how you want to feel in your life. The more time you spend basking in this juicy energythe bigger it will become, and the stronger the signal is that you will be sending out into the Universe. Imagine how powerful it would be if everyone in the world did this? WoowZza!!!
Pick a few of these tips out and give them a whirl, then take a minute to let me know how they are working for you.
As always, I love to hear what is going on in that head of yours, so share your thoughts in the comments below.
Heartache, Hardship and Freedom
Posted by: | CommentsLet’s face it-We all have stories that keep us stuck in crappy situations that clearly aren’t part of our Kick-Ass Lives!
These stories run deep and often times we don’t even notice them because they’ve been part of our belief system for so long. They steal our freedom to choose and we end up feeling powerless to change a crappy situation because we think that’s just the way it is.
Here is an example of one such story that I was carrying around that caused me a lot of heartache and dissatisfaction in my romantic life.
When I was small I had extravagant taste- I still do- and for as long as I can remember my Mom and Nana would tell me that I needed to marry a rich man to buy the things that I wanted for me.
This idea did not work for me. Even as a child, I was super independent and didn’t want to depend on anyone for anything! I declared that I was going to be rich myself and men were going to want me for my money. I would re-tell this story over and over again throughout my life.
Guess what happened?
I had a series of boyfriends who didn’t have any money and who relied on me to support us or wanted me to take care of them. The more I did this and bought into the story that I was going to be the bread winner and have to take care of them, the worse it got.
This situation felt really crappy and so wasn’t part of my Kick-Ass Life, but I didn’t know what to do about it. I was so caught up in my story I thought that this was just the way my relationships were supposed to be.
Luckily, I had a great coach who helped me see this story and change it.
I set myself free to re-write my story to say “I am surrounded by prosperity and helpful supportive men”. Now I’m in a deeply satisfying relationship with someone who is good with money, takes good care of himself, and loves to take care of me when I let him.
Here’s another example from a client -
A few days ago I had an inspiring conversation with Leah. She listened quietly while I talked about my life. After a bit she pointed out a comment I made as a child about overcoming hardships. She asked if I realized that this was a contract/story to overcome hardships in my life. I have continued to create them to overcome. The time I spent speaking with Leah helped to open the doors to hear those comments again. There is a profound difference in my daily activities, awareness and thinking about my life. I have overcome those hardships and do not need to create them anymore. Thank you Leah for your insight and willingness to listen through my story.
Thank you again. I am amazed at how aware I am now in regards to the thoughts that run through my mind. The level of awareness has a different meaning or understanding than before.
Bless you.
Rev. Connie Kirkpatrick
Spiritual Life Coach
Are you beginning to see how your stories effect your life?
What unsatisfying situations are you wanting to explore to identify the stories that are keeping you stuck?
If you want help identifying the stories that hold you back set up a Kick-Ass Consultation to discuss how we might work together to do this.
