Archive for unsatisfied
The Problem with Protecting Yourself From Your Desires
Posted by: | CommentsWhat do you want in your life and business?
The most common answer I hear to this question is “I don’t know”.
I think you do know, but you’re afraid to claim it because you don’t think you can really have it.
And that is the problem.
You don’t believe you can have what you want, so you don’t give yourself permission to go for it.
You protect yourself from your “unreasonable” desires by ignoring them. You only allow yourself to want the things you think you can have.
You think small and play small.
Guess what happens when you think and play small?
You ignore your desire to travel the world doing boudoir photo shoots and settle for taking pictures of kids and weddings because it seems doable and you really need the money. You end up frustrated and uninspired which negatively impacts your profits.
Or
You stay in the unsatisfying relationship because it’s better than the other’s that you have had, and you settle for a partner who doesn’t give you the love and affection that you desire. You crave affection and touch, and begin to feel undesirable. You end up wondering how you ended up this way.
Want to know how to change it?
Recognize that the only thing stopping you from having everything you desire is your story saying you can’t have it.
This story prevents you from dreaming and playing big! It makes you settle for an unsatisfying relationship, sucky job, and keeps you from expanding into your greatness.
We are here to expand, grow and be inspired.
Stop reigning yourself in and ignoring your desires. If you feel a strong desire that keeps coming back, it is meant for you! Give yourself permission to go for it!! The Universe is on your side and will show you the way if you let it.
The challenge is to identify where your stories about what is possible are holding you back. It’s hard to see these stories because you’re too close to them and they are wound deep into your belief system. You often need an outside perspective to see them clearly.
Here are so examples of the changes that can happen when you change up your story-
“You mean all I have to do is stop lying to myself?” is what an amazing women who hired me to help her improve her social life said. With-in one week of discovering the crappy old story that prevented her from having the relationships that she wanted, she was filling up her social calendar with fun new connections.
It can be that easy!
Another client let go of the stories that prevented her from going for her dream of being a documentary film maker, and someone else stopped playing it small and went on to create a life changing women’s event.
I can help you say “yes” to your desires and allow them in. You will be going for your dream job, expanding into your greatness, and tapping into all the juicy goodness that the world has to offer you.
Is this something that you can use? If your answer is “hell Yhea” send me an email and lets talk.
Why are we all so clueless when it comes to our own happiness?
Posted by: | CommentsBack in the day I was miserable in my job, and my “exciting, fabulous life” was completely unsatisfying. I was having a major identity crisis and had no idea who I wanted to be and what I wanted to do with my life.
On the surface it looked like I had it all. I had a job that paid well that I had lots of opportunities at. I had a nice apartment in the cool part of town. I was “somebody” in my social scene and I got VIP treatment at all the nightclubs and restaurants that I went to. I had a large circle of friends and there was always something to do.
It all felt so meaningless to me. I knew that there was something more out there for me, but I had no idea what it was. I felt unsatisfied, and this was a problem. It made me cranky, frustrated, and I liked to blame everyone else, especially at work, for my dissatisfaction. I was stressed out most of the time and I got sick a lot.
I had no idea what I wanted, I just knew that what I was living was not it.
How is it possible that I had no clue about what I wanted?
How could I not know what would bring satisfaction and meaning to my life?
I know that I’m not unique in having this problem. I hear similar stories from clients all the time.
I feel that I am meant for something more, but I am not sure what that is.
I am not sure what I want but I know that this is not “it”.
I want my life and work to be more meaningful, but I have no idea what that looks like.
How can everyone be so clueless around what would make them happy?
I think it all boils down to this:
We are not taught how to determine what would feel meaningful and make us happy.
We are actually taught the opposite.
We are taught how to; behave, do as we’re told, follow the rules, and like what we’re given.
And if you are like me, you spent a lot of time resisting this, but ultimately you learned that it was easier to play along and fit in.
You learn how to tune out the part of you that says “but I want this” and you half-heartedly embrace what you’re supposed to want.
BUT, there is always a part of you that is crying out for something more. Unfortunately, you get really good at ignoring it because it is too painful to hear.
The end result is that you hit your thirties and start to wonder “Is this it?” and a mid-life crisis is waiting for you right around the bend.
So….. what do you do?
How do you learn to tune into what really is meaningful to YOU and will make YOU happy?
Here are a few tips to get you started.
Start listening to the part of you that wants more from life. Give it permission to come forward and be heard.
Notice the parts of your life that feel bad to you. Get specific around what does not work for you. Then ask yourself what you would want instead.
Commit to looking for things that feel good and make you happy. Embrace them even if they’re unconventional and far from the norm.
Try these tips out and let me know what you discover in the comments below.
If you decide that you are tired of struggling with this on your own, send me an email by clicking here, to discuss how we can work together to get you clear on exactly what will bring more meaning and satisfaction to your life.
